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Category Archives: Adult/Erotic
Poison Ivy III: The New Seduction (1997)
Poison Ivy III: The New Seduction (1997)
Review by: Erin Page
WHAT IT’S ABOUT: A sinister seductress vows to destroy a suburban family.
REVIEW: The third installment in the Poison Ivy film franchise is only tied to the canon by the most tenuous of plot threads. As the opening credits roll, the movie scrambles in vain to connect those meandering dots, bombarding the audience with needlessly complicated information. We zoom in on a palatial hillside estate in sunny Los Angeles, where a jean-clad, sneering pool boy is busy ignoring his work to make sex-eyes with a woman inside. She shoos a series of children upstairs to play so she and the pool boy can fuck loudly in the kitchen. The girls seem cheerfully oblivious to the wall-pounding, screaming orgasms below, and have a tea party with a selection of creepy porcelain dolls. One of the girls (named Ivy), scoffs at playtime and skulks to the window, looking out onto the driveway where she witnesses a car pulling up. “There’s going to be fireworks,” the child actress intones badly, and we watch the six-year-old make a bizarre attempt at an evil grimace.
The Chlorine Cassanova strikes again!
The Demoniacs (1974)
The Demoniacs (1974)
Review by: Erin Page
WHAT IT’S ABOUT: When a gang of pirates cause a shipwreck, there are two survivors — a pair of innocent, twin girls. After attacking the women, the gang’s leader slowly goes mad, convinced that the twins are coming back from the dead to seek their unholy revenge.
REVIEW: Let it be known that “Redemption Films” and “Jean Rollin” are two things that should never be confused with the word “quality.” While some of his films have morbid appeal, I’m coming around to the conclusion that Rollin’s body of work consists of filming shit first and figuring out a plot second. That’s not to say that his movies don’t occasionally have glimmers of awesomeness, just that I believe whatever awesomeness he captures on film might be purely coincidental. Then again, maybe I just hate clowns.
Our story begins as a foursome of pirates known as “wreckers” prance around on the beach, lanterns in tow, gleefully trying to cause a shipwreck by misleading vessels close to the shore. Sure enough, a ship smashes into the rocks (one of those events too exciting to show on camera) and some treasure washes up on the beach. A single necklace and a few bolts of cloth later, the movie’s villains couldn’t be more pleased with themselves. Unfortunately, their well-thought-out scheme of murdering dozens of people for what amounts to a garage sale haul is brought to a screeching halt when two survivors stagger ashore.
Two sexy twin survivors!
Vampire Circus (1972)
Vampire Circus (1972)
Review by: Erin Page
WHAT IT’S ABOUT: Villagers are relieved when a circus breaks through the quarantine to take the locals’ minds off the plague… But their troubles are only beginning as children start to disappear, and the legacy of a long-ago massacre is brought to light.
REVIEW: Vampire Circus is one of my all-time favorite horror films. It bears the distinction of being one of the movies most responsible for traumatizing the ever-loving shit out of me as a child. Could it be that grossly irresponsible babysitting in the early ’80s warped my precious brain? Who’s to say what long-lasting, hard-wired damage a six-year-old would suffer from ridiculous repeated exposure to a movie where children are gleefully murdered and eaten? While the safe bet would be to NOT show this movie to your kids, you never know. They could turn out awesome, like me! Thank you, Vampire Circus!
The film begins as the beautiful Anna leads a small and giggling child through the forest to the gates of a secluded castle. They slip beyond the imposing gothic entrance as a frantic and terrified man arrives a moment too late, screaming their names. The poor chap is Albert, Anna’s husband. Within the castle walls, the girls encounter the mysterious Count Mitterhaus, who, aside from being dressed like a pirate, is totally a vampire. He charms the little girl, playing with her hair before ripping her throat out. Anna swoons with murderous delight, collapsing to the floor in ecstasy.
HUZZAH, madam.
Not the sexiest vampire lord. But at least he’s flashy.